Time To Buy That First Horse?

When is the Right Time To Buy That First Horse?

Written By: Bonnie Marlewski-Probert

This month?s column highlights a letter from Shirley, who is facing that important question, when is the right time to buy a first horse for my child? For all those parents out there who are battling with the same question, this month?s column should help you!

"Dear Bonnie,

My daughter will be 10 in October and would like to own a horse. She has taken lessons for 2 years, and has attended a live in camp in New Hampshire for a week last summer. She wants to be a vet. I think her interest is serious. Last year we explored 4-H, but Lauren seemed much younger than the other children, most of whom owned horses and/ or had families with farms. We are considering again this year.

I know nothing about horses, and cannot decide whether to just continue with weekly lessons, lease a horse, lease purchase, or buy. My daughter-in-law has some experience, and I could ask her teacher as well. The stable where she rides does boarding. What advise can you give me? I found a local website - Arabianrun.com that has a 3-year-old gelding for sale - $3500. We could also lease it I think. HELP. Shirley -"

I hope that your daughter realizes how lucky she is to have a parent who is actually considering the purchase of that first horse. In my book, A Parent?s Guide to Buying That First Horse, I open the book by telling my own personal story of getting my first horse. It is a very different story than yours!

Let?s address the problem by eliminating the big mistakes first. My first suggestion is that you skip the 3 year old Arabian. Whether you can lease or own, a three-year-old is an unsuitable mount for any first time horse owner. I go into much more detail in A Parent?s Guide, but a young horse is almost always a bad match for a new horse owner. As in a business partnership, if neither one of the partners knows what they are doing, the odds on a successful partnership are slim to nil. In the case of the young horse/new horse owner, a three-year-old horse has very low mileage and even less experience. Couple that with a new horse owner who has no experience handling a horse of their own without the assistance of constant supervision and you have a recipe for disaster.

In my own case, even though I had several years of formal instruction before buying my first mount, I still had to spend time on the "first horse owner" learning curve. My lessons included taking my horse to a local lake and leading him in on a three-foot long lead line, hoping that he would follow me. He did and then he passed me and then he swam away, leaving me screaming on the shoreline, soaked to the bone! These were common sense lessons that were never covered in my formal lessons! The short list of other "first horse owner" learning curve lessons included my first parade, first encounter trail riding alone and bumping into a combine on a back road, first time hot-rodding bareback with friends and the list goes on and on and on. Luckily, my instructor had the sense to steer my family to an older, wiser mount.

My first choice for a new horse owner is an older, wiser, more mileaged, seasoned, steady mount. These don?t have to be fancy looking and they don?t have to be expensive. Quite to the contrary. What your child really needs is what I call a babysitter. That is, a horse that is old enough to know better and experienced enough to allow your child to make their natural mistakes while on the "new horse owner" learning curve, without losing their sense of humor. These mounts are generally 15 years old or older. They do not have to be pedigreed animals (pure bloods), but can be mixed breeds (grade) from cooler bloodlines. If your family commits to such a mount for one to two years, your daughter will have the chance to learn, grow and make her mistakes in a safer environment. After that, if she decides that she really wants to compete, you could consider moving into a more specialty horse.

Incidentally, when I mention cooler blood lines I am referring to domesticated breeds with a reputation for being quiet, level headed and patient. These would include Quarter horses, Morgans, Tennessee Walkers, Appaloosas, Fjords, among others. I would recommend staying away from hotter bloodlines which would include Thoroughbreds and Arabians. I know there are thousands of thoroughbred and Arabian lovers out there who will argue that these breeds make wonderful mounts and I would agree with them. BUT, to be fair to these two particular breeds, because they are spirited, eager and very easily bored, it is unfair to put them in the hands of a new owner. The other breeds that I mentioned are happy to work with the "new horse owner" learning curve without losing their minds and for that reason, they make a better choice as a first horse.

As for joining 4-H. There are thousands of children in 4-H programs around the country and if you are careful, attentive and are willing to attend every meeting, horse show and practice, you and your family will benefit from the experience. I must admit to you that when I was in Indiana running a farm, I strongly urged my student?s families against joining 4-H. I did this solely for safety reasons. Caring volunteer parents who unfortunately had little or no experience around horses led the large 4-H program in our area of the state. The results included children who broke bones, ponies who routinely ran loose on the fairgrounds and general chaos. This was no place for children to learn safe, responsible, effective riding techniques.

Having said this, if you are able to locate a club that is run by a competent, responsible, trained horsemen, it can be a wonderful learning experience.

I think that so far, you have made wonderful decisions on behalf of your daughter. Enrolling her in a lesson program is a wise, very cost-effective decision, as those lessons will pay dividends for years and years to come. Additionally, enrolling her in the live-in camp is also a wonderful opportunity for her. So, where do we go from here?

Although, A Parent?s Guide to Buying that First Horse devotes many chapters to this topic, let me outline a brief plan for you here that will help direct you:

1. If your daughter has expressed an interest in being a vet, I would recommend calling the larger vet practices in your area and asking if it would be possible for her to do a drive-along on weekends and holidays. This is a great way to spend time with professionals and see, first hand, what the life of a vet is like. Most vets are happy to oblige, provided their schedule will permit.
2. If you are having a hard time deciding on whether or not to purchase a first horse because you feel you don?t know anything about horses, I would like to recommend that YOU and/or your husband consider enrolling in a riding program. Not only is riding a fabulous, fun sport, but you have an opportunity here to share your daughter?s passion on a level that most parent?s can only dream about. Trying this idea will not only be good for your overall health and fun factor, but it will pay huge dividends in the years to come when most teenagers can?t stand to be around their parents. In your case, you will be an active part of your daughter?s most cherished pursuit and that is worth millions.
3. Volunteerism. This is something that I encourage in my book and something that I will recommend to your family as well. When I was taking lessons as a child, I volunteered my time at the barn to clean tack, muck stalls, feed, water, and anything else that I could think of. These were the most educational times of my life and made me a much better horseman in the end. In my case, I paid for my lessons by mucking stalls and pitching in at the barn. In addition to volunteering at the barn, your daughter could explore volunteering at the vet?s office as well. Doing one or both of these things will help you decide just how serious she is about horse ownership.
4. I would recommend that before you decide to buy, arrange a one-month-long lease period on one of her favorite school horses at the barn. It would make a wonderful Birthday present, although I generally recommend families focus on doing the lease as a Christmas gift because the end of December and all of January are generally the worst in terms of weather. Any child who is still champing at the bit to get out to the barn when there are snowdrifts and wind chill factors, is probably a child who is ready to own their own horse. The added value of the month-long lease is that it is given as a gift for 30 days. This means that there is a built-in end date to the gift and everyone knows that before you begin. On the other hand, the parent who buys the horse for the Birthday gift and finds out that their child lost interest when the snow fell, is stuck. You are stuck with the horse, the saddle, the bridle, the blankets, the brushes, etc., etc. This is not only unfair to you, but more than that; it is unfair to the horse.

I will leave you with one last thought. Whether you buy a horse or not ? there is something more important going on in your home right now and if you responsibly address that issue, the horse issue is a snap. The bigger issue going on in your home is the issue of "how do we make major decisions in life." There is a fabulous life lesson available to you and your daughter right now, if you choose to take advantage of it. Why not make your daughter part of the process? After all, buying a first horse for your daughter at this point is comparable in size to her buying her first home when she is in her 20?s. The same learning curve applies. The same problem solving skills apply. The same solutions apply in both situations. Why not take advantage of this opportunity, make her intimately involved in the process, and ask her to do research on the internet on different breeds. She can make lists of her needs and desires and only consider those breeds and individuals that meet those criteria (no matter how beautiful they may be).

If this process is sounding like the process you followed when you chose your spouse or your last house, there is no coincidence ? it is the same process. Any chance you have to help your child learn how to make responsible decisions, is a good thing. On the same topic, why not include her in the financial planning for such an investment? For example, how much money is she going to be kicking in for the daily maintenance of her new horse? What chores is she willing to pick up around the house in order to offset some of those expenses? I would suggest to you that if you bring her completely into the process from start to finish, you may well have your daughter telling you that she would rather lease a horse than buy one after all. Or, she may decide that lessons are a better investment rather than ownership because of the trade-offs. My point is that there are a thousand different ways to ride and own a horse. Some are more traditional than others and some are more expensive than others. Which you choose should depend on your family?s unique situation and I would recommend that your daughter be an active participant in that process.